Day 20 // Grimoire & Oils

Huzzah! My grimoire is good to go. I'm still messing with and decorating the cover but I couldn't help but show it off! If you'd like to see how I made it, here's step by step pictures of how I did it: Grimoire

Lastly, my first set of oils arrived! :) I'm so excited! I got them from www.mountainroseherbs.com. I love essential oils and I'm so thrilled to begin making my own solutions of them :) Lots of wonderful things with this full moon.

Day 19 // Full Moon Blessings to everyone!

Tonight, I am introducing my grimoire to the night under the full moon. It's been sitting out from sunset and will past sunrise! I'm so excited about it!

I also messed around with some clay for some decorations on the top. Can't wait to show that off too.. barring it doesn't suck when I'm done :P

In other news, work sucks. The big D. I'm ready to move on with this week. To keep me positive, I've started reading "The New Hermetics" by Jason Augustus Newcombe. So far not bad but we'll see. I have this sneaky feeling he's just trying to sell books, but I guess I'll find out. I need to move it to my Nook to finish it faster. I'll review it here when I'm finished.

Day 18 // The Adalaim Pantheon

Before I get to the heavy stuff, let me mention that my grimoire is nearly done. I've added studs, experimented with some air-dry/bake clay to add decor and effects.. . I'm thinking I'll place it out in the full moon tomorrow night (*here's to no rain*) among the pink flowers in my backyard and I will consider it attuned to the elements and ready for ritual introduction. It's been a lot of work but totally worth it!

Lastly, I've been deeply troubled by my pantheon (or rather lack thereof). I have meditated daily, waited for signs and dreams and have received no recognition of "whom" I should be making offerings too. In the beginning I've been saying "Lord and Lady" and to be honest, it's just not cutting it. It's impersonal and I believe names have power. While I'm not a feminist, I still began looking for my "main" Goddess to identify with. Trust me, I don't have anything against Gods. But as a mother and a wife and as a daughter.. I figured it would be easier to start there. .. .. and I've had no luck.

I started looking at cultures. I identify with the Celtic because I'm from a VERY heavy Irish background but if I believe that names have power (which I do).. I need to be able to pronounce the names.. and Gaelic.. quite frankly. ... is kicking my ass. I lose myself reading Irish folklore trying to pronounce all the names that I forget to enjoy the story. I also identify with Shinto, because I lived in Japan for a time and loved it, completely fell in love and went to Shinto shrines for festivals yearly. However, most of the Shinto belief is steeped in the idea that Japan is sacred and while I wouldn't disagree.. I can't really.. do much about it.. from Bible Belt, USA. The land here is.. well.. almost ugly (*wince*) to me and I feel like I don't belong here in this place.. therefore it's hard to connect it to the Japanese divine.

Aside from that, I'm realizing there's an undercurrent of commonality among cultures. They chose deities for similar, if not identical, concepts. Therefore, the culture matters not, because the divine is universal and all encompassing. Those people created those stories and those names for their Gods/desses because that's what made since in their language to them. *sigh*

This is what I was looking for:

• ancient or at least considered ancient by that pantheon's terms
• a name I could pronounce and moved through me like the vibration of a perfectly tuned bell when I said it
• of the elements, fire, earth, air, water...

That last bit is important. That's right.. I don't identify with the Goddess of Healing or the God of War. Can't help it. Therefore, I would rather work with personifications of the elements. So, tonight I decided I would create my own pantheon. It includes Egyptian, Greek, and Fiji/Polynesian/Hawaiian, and .. me. Yup, you read that right.. I'm making me part of the pantheon.

Okay, so I'm not going to worship me with a mirror.. I'm not vain lol. Hear me out.. I want to include Spirit and I think it would make sense that my soul, my consciousness, my flaws and my talents would best represent the spirit in my workings... because it is me... a being of the elements, of the universe.. a product of the divine energy that has created everything, feeds everything and returns from everything. Being therefore part of the divine.. makes my energy divine. Therefore the Goddess of Spirit.. would be .. .. me.

My heart feels most at peace with what I've decided tonight and that's what matters most, right? :)

Day 5 // First Esbat

Today, I cleansed my modest altar and dedicated it in honor of the new moon. It was very exciting... okay for me at least.

Other than that, I have run out of youtube channels to watch and websites to visit. I hate that most pagan websites are poorly designed.

In other news, I hate that Oak cause such debilitating allergic reactions when pollinating. I love Oak so much, but Fawn gets so sick from it :( It's very frustrating. This weekend we go shopping for her 2nd birthday and I hope she's feeling good enough to visit with her grandparents.

Day 2 // Baby Steps

Today was a day of baby steps.

- I moved my treadmill out of my garage to save it from the oncoming summer heat and hopefully to encourage me to use it more often.

- I gave my first true offerings to the spirits that surround my home with a fresh pear, a fresh grapefruit and french bread. Which was easy to give out when I woke up to find my backyard covered in dew and pink evening primrose flowers. In the center on my lawn was a large grass spider web with about a million drops of water on it. I thought it all was an excellent omen to my new start.

- I cleaned out my walk-in closet to make room for a table to become my altar.

- I setup my altar though it is comprised of three things. A working candle and a candle for the Goddess and for the God. That simple. It will grow. I know it. But right now, baby steps. The new moon is in a couple days so I will most likely wait for then to cleansing and what not. The whole “sha-bang” if you will.

- I made a few pouches today for rituals on the esbats.

- Watered my little seedlings

- I tested out a couple ideas for my book of shadows. I can’t wait to begin building it and then of course for sharing how I did it. ^.^

Other than that, it was also a day of laundry and getting ready for the week ahead. Fawn has been sneezing all day, surely a sign that the local oak have pollinated. If the weather could decide what it wanted it to do, it may move it out of the air, but alas today felt like a day in the northwest. Muggy, misty, humid and cool. I loved it.