Once.. my year and a day blog. Now turned to witchy woman incognito!
So what happened between that last post and now....
A whole hell of a lot.
1. I finally got the promotion I had been working on at work and I'm much happier.
2. Despite previously stated promotion -- I'm working on my second career.
3. I was accepted into grad school and have completed a semester. *sigh* three and a half to go. *remember kids, you're never too old for school*
4. That's pretty much it!
My husband (L2) and I took a random, short vacation to the pacific northwest last summer and loved it so much.. we are setting ourselves up to move there in 2013. In fact, its our entire goal. Everything we do today is for that goal.
My little one (Fawn) is getting bigger and more beautiful every day.
And what is this witch doing daily? I'm up to lots of shit. Stay tuned.
Showing posts with label Fawn. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fawn. Show all posts
Monday, January 2, 2012
Monday, May 3, 2010
Day 24 // Personal Crap
So here it is.. personal life creeps in and gets serious.
Fawn had a dr's appt today (her 2 yr well-baby) and she's still on the smaller side in height and weight. But she's good. The issue is her speaking.
She refuses to speak. Yes, I know.. it's unbelievable.. a 2 year old that won't talk. It's not as uncommon as you may think. While I was one to talk non-stop the minute I understood the spoken word.. my husband didn't speak until he was 3. The thing is.. you could talk to her like she's 12 with several commands in a row.. and she'll do them and understand completely what you want her to do. She gets bored with toys and only entertains herself with creative things (play-doh, pretend play, coloring, painting, building with blocks, writing). She has no interest in books or dolls or things like that. She gives the illusion of communication because she's so extremely expressive in her face and body language. But if you count the words she actually says .. it's barely 30.. and 15 of those we force her to say. She'd rather INVENT sign language to speak... which she has done. She'd rather take your finger to show you what she wants instead of say it. She'd rather figure out how to get it herself or do it herself if you ask her to say the word. When she was 13mos, I'd try to get her to speak by saying "Fawn.. Say 'drink'," and she'd just nod. It was the weirdest thing. She knew an ungodly amount of vocabulary at 12 mos but wouldn't speak it. She'd just nod as if to tell you "Yea, that's what it's called. Give it to me." "No, Fawn.. say "Drink".. watch mommy's mouth.. say "da da da drink".. of course I'm just looking for an attempt. She would just nod.
Honestly, it breaks my heart to see other two year olds speaking 3-4 word sentences and bridging new ideas and sharing what they think.. and my daughter barely says two syllable words. It's heartwrenching to think of the last year of us busting our asses to get her to talk. We've refused giving her things (extra things she didn't need like one more piece of cheese for a snack.. or one more cookie .. something unnecessary) unless she used the word, and she'll eventually say it after much struggling to get her to even TRY. But the next time, it's the same struggle. We've rewarded her with m&m's for saying a word.. to see if it was defiance and stubbornness and it didn't matter. Her first words were shoes and please. Yea.. seriously..
No, I take that back. When she was 8mos old I have a recording of her repeating Mama over and over again.. and it would make me cry. She would do all of her sounds with me and everything, it was beautiful and then all of a sudden... Nothing. I know there's little to no research, but they're convinced she doesn't have a hearing problem due to frequent ear infections and now tubes in her ears since 11mos. But I'm not convinced. She hears.. but I'm not sure the sound isn't distorted. She seems HYPER sensitive to sound :/
Either way, we've been referred to a speech pathologist to determine what her issue is. I really hope whatever it is, it's correctable. And if it is stubbornness.. because Fawn is pretty damn stubborn... then we're in trouble.
Fawn had a dr's appt today (her 2 yr well-baby) and she's still on the smaller side in height and weight. But she's good. The issue is her speaking.
She refuses to speak. Yes, I know.. it's unbelievable.. a 2 year old that won't talk. It's not as uncommon as you may think. While I was one to talk non-stop the minute I understood the spoken word.. my husband didn't speak until he was 3. The thing is.. you could talk to her like she's 12 with several commands in a row.. and she'll do them and understand completely what you want her to do. She gets bored with toys and only entertains herself with creative things (play-doh, pretend play, coloring, painting, building with blocks, writing). She has no interest in books or dolls or things like that. She gives the illusion of communication because she's so extremely expressive in her face and body language. But if you count the words she actually says .. it's barely 30.. and 15 of those we force her to say. She'd rather INVENT sign language to speak... which she has done. She'd rather take your finger to show you what she wants instead of say it. She'd rather figure out how to get it herself or do it herself if you ask her to say the word. When she was 13mos, I'd try to get her to speak by saying "Fawn.. Say 'drink'," and she'd just nod. It was the weirdest thing. She knew an ungodly amount of vocabulary at 12 mos but wouldn't speak it. She'd just nod as if to tell you "Yea, that's what it's called. Give it to me." "No, Fawn.. say "Drink".. watch mommy's mouth.. say "da da da drink".. of course I'm just looking for an attempt. She would just nod.
Honestly, it breaks my heart to see other two year olds speaking 3-4 word sentences and bridging new ideas and sharing what they think.. and my daughter barely says two syllable words. It's heartwrenching to think of the last year of us busting our asses to get her to talk. We've refused giving her things (extra things she didn't need like one more piece of cheese for a snack.. or one more cookie .. something unnecessary) unless she used the word, and she'll eventually say it after much struggling to get her to even TRY. But the next time, it's the same struggle. We've rewarded her with m&m's for saying a word.. to see if it was defiance and stubbornness and it didn't matter. Her first words were shoes and please. Yea.. seriously..
No, I take that back. When she was 8mos old I have a recording of her repeating Mama over and over again.. and it would make me cry. She would do all of her sounds with me and everything, it was beautiful and then all of a sudden... Nothing. I know there's little to no research, but they're convinced she doesn't have a hearing problem due to frequent ear infections and now tubes in her ears since 11mos. But I'm not convinced. She hears.. but I'm not sure the sound isn't distorted. She seems HYPER sensitive to sound :/
Either way, we've been referred to a speech pathologist to determine what her issue is. I really hope whatever it is, it's correctable. And if it is stubbornness.. because Fawn is pretty damn stubborn... then we're in trouble.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Day 22 // Happy Beltane!
Last night, I held a small solitary ritual for Beltane making some Beltane Oil and followed with a Banishing Oil I had been meaning to make. I wish there was a local group nearby that I could participate with, but alas, solitary is excellent if not better ;) This marks the very first holiday I have participated in as a pagan.
Did I mention that I love little glass bottles? ^.^
Any who, we made a trip out to buy some wood. Get this! I want to make a raised bed, right? For my herbs. If you go and buy a pre-cut raised bed kit from "PLUG IN LOCAL DO-IT-YOURSELF LAWN AND HOME STORE", you can pay around 70$ !!!!! That's not counting the soil to fill it! Good grief that's a scam!
So, being the thrifty freak I am.. I'm doing it myself ;) Huzzah! I'm sticking it to the Do-it-yourself man.... whoever.. he is.
I bought a 5/4" x 6" x 16' plank of wood, had THEM cut it (they cut it for free) into two 6" x 4' planks and two 6" x 3' planks for a whopping.. $7.00!!! Then add in the 2" wood screws and you've got MAYBE $10 with sales tax for a 4' x 3' raised bed. I could have had a 5' x 3' but I was afraid it wouldn't fit in the car with the car seat in the back.. .. plus... Fawn, lol. I don't think she'd take kindly to sharing space with lumber not to mention the safety hazard. SO! 4'x3' it is and it's plenty big enough.
Iwas chicken shit decided to play it smart and since the herbs were doing so well in the little biodegradable cells, I bought biodegradable 4"- 6'' pots to transplant them into before exposing them to the raised bed, raw like... ...
Since everything was biodegradable I just left the herbs in their original cells, ripped off the bottoms so the roots didn't have to fight through the container (even though they had started too) and sat them inside the new biodegradable pots. Filled in the sides with soil and sat them outside. They're currently enjoying their first evening and night in fresh air and pure sunlight. I watered them and left them on my cement slab until I can build the bed tomorrow morning.. I would have done it today but .. the summer heat was in full gear and I was already working quite a sweat watering the lawn in near 90F heat at 7pm.
Let me tell you, 23 containers of baby herbs makes you look quite the pro if you've never grown anything. Dare I say, I have a light green thumb? If they survive the transplant/move outside and the treacherous onslaught of summer, I'll officially title myself, Queen of the Herbs!!! ... for the day at least.. :P
Did I mention that I love little glass bottles? ^.^
Any who, we made a trip out to buy some wood. Get this! I want to make a raised bed, right? For my herbs. If you go and buy a pre-cut raised bed kit from "PLUG IN LOCAL DO-IT-YOURSELF LAWN AND HOME STORE", you can pay around 70$ !!!!! That's not counting the soil to fill it! Good grief that's a scam!
So, being the thrifty freak I am.. I'm doing it myself ;) Huzzah! I'm sticking it to the Do-it-yourself man.... whoever.. he is.
I bought a 5/4" x 6" x 16' plank of wood, had THEM cut it (they cut it for free) into two 6" x 4' planks and two 6" x 3' planks for a whopping.. $7.00!!! Then add in the 2" wood screws and you've got MAYBE $10 with sales tax for a 4' x 3' raised bed. I could have had a 5' x 3' but I was afraid it wouldn't fit in the car with the car seat in the back.. .. plus... Fawn, lol. I don't think she'd take kindly to sharing space with lumber not to mention the safety hazard. SO! 4'x3' it is and it's plenty big enough.
I
Since everything was biodegradable I just left the herbs in their original cells, ripped off the bottoms so the roots didn't have to fight through the container (even though they had started too) and sat them inside the new biodegradable pots. Filled in the sides with soil and sat them outside. They're currently enjoying their first evening and night in fresh air and pure sunlight. I watered them and left them on my cement slab until I can build the bed tomorrow morning.. I would have done it today but .. the summer heat was in full gear and I was already working quite a sweat watering the lawn in near 90F heat at 7pm.
Let me tell you, 23 containers of baby herbs makes you look quite the pro if you've never grown anything. Dare I say, I have a light green thumb? If they survive the transplant/move outside and the treacherous onslaught of summer, I'll officially title myself, Queen of the Herbs!!! ... for the day at least.. :P
Friday, April 30, 2010
Day 21 // Bright Blessings on Beltane!
Say that 9 times fast! :P
Tonight, I took Fawn outside and taught her how to pick flowers ;) She was of course very interested in just the petals and would pluck them off one by one. I think the little nature spirits in my backyard would have found her sweet and innocent. The ladybugs wouldn't leave her alone, so I'm taking that as a sign of them liking her ;P She is an Earth baby, born Taurus on Earth day after all.. ;) Okay, so Earth day is a made up holiday, but still.
So I taught her how to pick them and get the whole buttercup flower! What a concept! lol! We gathered them up and placed them on the altar. Something's been chomping on them because several have perfectly cut out round holes in the petals ;P
I received my six essential oils from mountainroseherbs today and oh my goodness they smell so FREAKIN' good!!! The lemon and orange.. man. I'm a sucker for citrus. I also got my glass bottles from sunburst. 30 little amber 15ml bottles with reducers and 12 glass jars for dried herbs. I love glass bottles. Have I mentioned that before? Just looking at them make me happy! They're so freakishly cute!
Lastly, the plan for this weekend is to transplant my herbs finally to the outdoors. They've stopped growing. They're definitely not dead, they've just reached their peak for their little starter cells and the biodegradable container is breaking a part. So it looks like I'm going to buy some planks of wood and build a raised-bed for my herbs. The ground here is too tough and dry. Not to mention probably nutrient poor. So, I'll start in the raised bed and maybe by the time the roots get deep enough they'll have a good enough root system to adjust to the naturaldust dirt.
.. meanwhile, I've made a recent addition to my "Dream House Must Haves" list and it includes a huge greenhouse lol.
Tonight, I took Fawn outside and taught her how to pick flowers ;) She was of course very interested in just the petals and would pluck them off one by one. I think the little nature spirits in my backyard would have found her sweet and innocent. The ladybugs wouldn't leave her alone, so I'm taking that as a sign of them liking her ;P She is an Earth baby, born Taurus on Earth day after all.. ;) Okay, so Earth day is a made up holiday, but still.
So I taught her how to pick them and get the whole buttercup flower! What a concept! lol! We gathered them up and placed them on the altar. Something's been chomping on them because several have perfectly cut out round holes in the petals ;P
I received my six essential oils from mountainroseherbs today and oh my goodness they smell so FREAKIN' good!!! The lemon and orange.. man. I'm a sucker for citrus. I also got my glass bottles from sunburst. 30 little amber 15ml bottles with reducers and 12 glass jars for dried herbs. I love glass bottles. Have I mentioned that before? Just looking at them make me happy! They're so freakishly cute!
Lastly, the plan for this weekend is to transplant my herbs finally to the outdoors. They've stopped growing. They're definitely not dead, they've just reached their peak for their little starter cells and the biodegradable container is breaking a part. So it looks like I'm going to buy some planks of wood and build a raised-bed for my herbs. The ground here is too tough and dry. Not to mention probably nutrient poor. So, I'll start in the raised bed and maybe by the time the roots get deep enough they'll have a good enough root system to adjust to the natural
.. meanwhile, I've made a recent addition to my "Dream House Must Haves" list and it includes a huge greenhouse lol.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Day 11 // BOS
So today, all 300 pages were finished drying. I separated them into 9 different sections .. hole punched them 8 times each.. and set eyelets in four of the holes. I'm done for the night.
I feel so crappy. Whatever is floating in the air is killing me. Okay, so not literally, just jeez. My throat is screaming for attention and nothing soothes it, I can barely speak and just generally feel crappy.
So while I could still have time to strings the book together, I opted not too. I still have until the full moon to set it outside and I have Fawn's birthday to get ready for. *sigh* I do have to say, the book is looking quite fabulous.
I feel so crappy. Whatever is floating in the air is killing me. Okay, so not literally, just jeez. My throat is screaming for attention and nothing soothes it, I can barely speak and just generally feel crappy.
So while I could still have time to strings the book together, I opted not too. I still have until the full moon to set it outside and I have Fawn's birthday to get ready for. *sigh* I do have to say, the book is looking quite fabulous.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Day 8 // BoS & Altar
So I finally gathered the materials to begin building my Book. But it will take probably until the full moon to get it set up, which is great. I'll be happy if I have the bulk (the paper) portion of the book completed and set out in the moonlight by then. I've got 11 days.
My current BoS is a spiral bound notebook. Lawl. Hey, we all have to start somewhere. Ill take pictures and post them as I build it.
Today I went to Hobby Lobby and found that candles were 50% off! Bought several tapers in several different colors for $ .50, all candle holders too. I got an incense burner I can tolerate from World Market. It's meant to be a candle holder, but I'm adapting it for burning cone incense. It's just me but I can't stand how silly stick incense looks sticking out of a hole from something. Way to phallic for my liking, but then again.. .maybe I'm just perverted. lol. So anyway, cute little incense holder over my altar. Ribbon and trim was 50% off too, so I bought some satin rope for making bags which brings me to my largest purchase! I finally got a crop-a-dile!
I dabble in scrapbooking and a crop-a-dile is a necessity for creating holes in materials for the books as well as installing snaps and eyelets. WELL! I finally got one and I'm so excited I can use it for making bags too! Ya know, little bags to hold my tarot cards, runes, etc.
In another store, I found this adorable little dish made in japan in the shape of a bloated fish. I'm using it to hold water on my altar.
I also found a little ceramic square dish made in japan that I'm going to use as an offering plate. Currently, it's holding rocks L2 (my hubby) has collected and thought was cool. The poor things have been sitting on our dresser forever with no proper home. Consider it taken care of.
Found a glass bottle to hold some gemstones.
BEST OF ALL! I got all of Fawn's birthday shopping done as well as party decoration shopping! Over the summer, I'll be repainting her bedroom to be a fairy-land. The plan is to paint the walls purple with a mural on her largest wall of a magical forest. Then paint and decorate bird houses from craft stores into fairy houses and hang them from the roof in her room to give the decorations a more interactive feel. I'm not quite sure what to put on the actual walls yet where there isn't a mural. Ah well, it'll come to me ;) I love painting so it should be a fantastic project and I'll be sure to show lots of pictures.
Lessee.. other than that. Busy weekend! Busy week to come! I have cookies to make tomorrow for a colleague who is returning to work after being gone for four months due to a broken hip. I have Fawn's birthday presents to wrap, day care cupcakes to make and her birthday cake for her party Saturday. Pictures to follow! :)
My current BoS is a spiral bound notebook. Lawl. Hey, we all have to start somewhere. Ill take pictures and post them as I build it.
Today I went to Hobby Lobby and found that candles were 50% off! Bought several tapers in several different colors for $ .50, all candle holders too. I got an incense burner I can tolerate from World Market. It's meant to be a candle holder, but I'm adapting it for burning cone incense. It's just me but I can't stand how silly stick incense looks sticking out of a hole from something. Way to phallic for my liking, but then again.. .maybe I'm just perverted. lol. So anyway, cute little incense holder over my altar. Ribbon and trim was 50% off too, so I bought some satin rope for making bags which brings me to my largest purchase! I finally got a crop-a-dile!
I dabble in scrapbooking and a crop-a-dile is a necessity for creating holes in materials for the books as well as installing snaps and eyelets. WELL! I finally got one and I'm so excited I can use it for making bags too! Ya know, little bags to hold my tarot cards, runes, etc.
In another store, I found this adorable little dish made in japan in the shape of a bloated fish. I'm using it to hold water on my altar.
I also found a little ceramic square dish made in japan that I'm going to use as an offering plate. Currently, it's holding rocks L2 (my hubby) has collected and thought was cool. The poor things have been sitting on our dresser forever with no proper home. Consider it taken care of.
Found a glass bottle to hold some gemstones.
BEST OF ALL! I got all of Fawn's birthday shopping done as well as party decoration shopping! Over the summer, I'll be repainting her bedroom to be a fairy-land. The plan is to paint the walls purple with a mural on her largest wall of a magical forest. Then paint and decorate bird houses from craft stores into fairy houses and hang them from the roof in her room to give the decorations a more interactive feel. I'm not quite sure what to put on the actual walls yet where there isn't a mural. Ah well, it'll come to me ;) I love painting so it should be a fantastic project and I'll be sure to show lots of pictures.
Lessee.. other than that. Busy weekend! Busy week to come! I have cookies to make tomorrow for a colleague who is returning to work after being gone for four months due to a broken hip. I have Fawn's birthday presents to wrap, day care cupcakes to make and her birthday cake for her party Saturday. Pictures to follow! :)
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Day 5 // First Esbat
Today, I cleansed my modest altar and dedicated it in honor of the new moon. It was very exciting... okay for me at least.
Other than that, I have run out of youtube channels to watch and websites to visit. I hate that most pagan websites are poorly designed.
In other news, I hate that Oak cause such debilitating allergic reactions when pollinating. I love Oak so much, but Fawn gets so sick from it :( It's very frustrating. This weekend we go shopping for her 2nd birthday and I hope she's feeling good enough to visit with her grandparents.
Other than that, I have run out of youtube channels to watch and websites to visit. I hate that most pagan websites are poorly designed.
In other news, I hate that Oak cause such debilitating allergic reactions when pollinating. I love Oak so much, but Fawn gets so sick from it :( It's very frustrating. This weekend we go shopping for her 2nd birthday and I hope she's feeling good enough to visit with her grandparents.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Day 2 // Baby Steps
Today was a day of baby steps.
- I moved my treadmill out of my garage to save it from the oncoming summer heat and hopefully to encourage me to use it more often.
- I gave my first true offerings to the spirits that surround my home with a fresh pear, a fresh grapefruit and french bread. Which was easy to give out when I woke up to find my backyard covered in dew and pink evening primrose flowers. In the center on my lawn was a large grass spider web with about a million drops of water on it. I thought it all was an excellent omen to my new start.
- I cleaned out my walk-in closet to make room for a table to become my altar.
- I setup my altar though it is comprised of three things. A working candle and a candle for the Goddess and for the God. That simple. It will grow. I know it. But right now, baby steps. The new moon is in a couple days so I will most likely wait for then to cleansing and what not. The whole “sha-bang” if you will.
- I made a few pouches today for rituals on the esbats.
- Watered my little seedlings
- I tested out a couple ideas for my book of shadows. I can’t wait to begin building it and then of course for sharing how I did it. ^.^
Other than that, it was also a day of laundry and getting ready for the week ahead. Fawn has been sneezing all day, surely a sign that the local oak have pollinated. If the weather could decide what it wanted it to do, it may move it out of the air, but alas today felt like a day in the northwest. Muggy, misty, humid and cool. I loved it.
Day 1 // New Beginnings
Even though I’ve been rekindling my love for my beliefs for several weeks, I’m counting today as day one.
My make-shift book of shadows still remains as a spiral notebook with random ramblings, lists of ideas, lists of needs, lists of wants, and more lists. Did I mention I’m a list maker? It’s because I like to plan. Don’t get me wrong, I’m pretty good on my feet in the heat of the moment when it matters, but I love having a plan. And a list. or two. or five.
Whatever.
I was out today with L2 (hubby for 5.5 years) and Fawn (our 23month old daughter). I finally managed to get a working candle and a matching set of candles for the Goddess and God, as well as 2 glass plates to put them on. I’m recycling a very wicked-looking vase I was given a while back, but never used, to hold my working candle. The first steps to a real altar. It will be modest to say the least, but every altar has to start somewhere and it most definitely doesn’t matter how elaborate it is as long as the intention is there. As well as, hubby and I went a bit overboard on the tax money and spent it all redoing our downstairs (floors, dining room set, new living room suite, etc). So I’ll be in a better position to get supplies in a few weeks. But all in due time.
My plan tomorrow is to start reorganizing our large walk-in closet to make room for a table to be my altar. I’m super excited about claiming some space. And no worries, my husband isn’t shoving me in the closet. lol. We have a free third bedroom, I could claim but the idea of friends and family coming to stay and as I am not public about my religious choice, and don’t plan on being any time soon, taking down everything I will eventually have up seems a bit daunting. Therefore, I’ll just start in the large closet and be able to keep it away from others all the time.
The real treat? I just learned this weekend that a very old-fashioned wardrobe my mother had been using for 28 years is now mine. She bought it at an estate sale for 48$ when she was pregnant with me with the intention of giving it to me one day. It’s taking up space in her house and with my new path I realized what an ideal craft cabinet it would make. I’ll take pictures when we’ve moved it in. It’s believed to be over 100 years old.
I titled Day 1 as new beginnings because, well the obvious for starting my path, but not only buying the very first pieces to my altar BUT with beginning my craft as well. I bought herb seeds and have planted them today in a large germination tray. There’s about 13 different types and I have already made plans for where they will be transplanted too in September. I love herbs. I love the idea of growing and caring for them. I love the idea of drying them out and using them in incense and tinctures. If I could purr, I’d be doing it right now ;P
Quite a successful Day 1. I admit.
Aside from the magick already occurring in my life. I fell in love with herbs as a part of religious practice and have been pouring over youtube videos, websites and encyclopedias thinking how wonderful it would be to have my own garden and that I would have to make one, one day and low and behold, a friend had found some extra biodegradable germination trays and offered me one with six sets of herb seeds to get started. They hadn’t known I had been looking into growing herbs. ..
Then there’s the case of the soon-to-be witchie cabinet coming my way. With all the right compartments, to be used as such presents itself right when I decide to claim some space.
The Goddess is alive and magick is afoot, I believe ;) Be positive, be love and you will find love in everything.
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